Will Power & Self-Determination: Why You Constantly Fail
This should be about my thoughts on human nature, human relations, human experience and basically about what the hell is going on in life and what’s the point of all this. Big questions right? Well, let me begin with the concept of self-determination, why it matters and what it means.
Self-determination is control of your life. It means freedom to be and do what you want in life, and the capacity to achieve it. Cause let’s be honest, to want something is one thing, but to have the guts and stamina to go for it and walk the walk is another thing. Theory and praxis are not the same. So self-determination means both, knowing what you want, and actually doing something, taking the necessary steps to achieve it. You are what you do, not what you say you’ll so - that sums it up pretty neatly.
It is human nature to be active and to influence things in our surroundings, each of us in our own special way. Our capacities are always limited, cause we are limited beings, obviously, but it’s natural for us to get up early in the morning and do stuff. Just try to lie the whole day in bed after you got your proper rest, and you will see how difficult it is to remain motionless. Your body craves for expression, and that’s a good thing. It means you are alive.
Now, we all set certain goals and make plans, but often it is difficult to achieve those, cause our own habits stand in our own way of success. For example, I strive to work out in gym regularly, and make certain home exercises every day. I love physical training, but we know there’s lots of people for whom working out is a hard thing. Others want to quit smoking and it’s difficult for them too. The list of undesired habits goes on and on, some of them trivial, and others more profound which have to do with character traits.
So why is it difficult to achieve personal goals? Cause you need to break with habits and false beliefs in your mind that prevent you from realising your objective. And that’s the most difficult thing to do.
And although it’s hard, we should always try our best, because every attempt to establish a new useful habit contributes to your final success in future. At the beginning you will fail many times, you’ll smoke that cigarette, you’ll skip that gym session, you’ll do the thing that you didn’t want to make, but the constant awareness of your goal and the little attempts and efforts to change, will overtime make it easier for you to renounce and surrender the bad habit, and do the thing that you wanted to do. Just keep on moving and don’t give up at every failed attempt, cause the path to ultimate victory is made by little daily failures. Until our new behaviour, our new habit grows strong enough to fail us no more.
I hope you can finally see why new year’s resolutions often don’t work. They don’t work initially, because people’s objective was superficial and the motivation to walk the walk wasn’t there. But if you really badly want to achieve something, you will have the internal motivation to make the attempts over and over again, until you’ll see the results you want to see. That’s determination, self-determination. And the training of new habits through constant attempts makes your will power strong. But it’s lots of work and you need to make the physical and mental effort. Nothing comes through self-inflicted laziness.
So to sum it up, achieving difficult results is a matter of character change where you establish a new habit, or a new way of thinking, through which you break with your past and with your false belief. It might be a painful process if you don’t have enough initial motivation to lead you through, but eventually if you remain persistent, you’ll always get somewhere. That’s self-determination and freedom to lead your life. It’s the type of freedom into which we need to grow into. It doesn’t come on its own. But the effort is definitely worth it.
If you desire something special in your life and you know it’s a good thing for you, stop making excuses and start immediately.
So, that's my words of wisdom.